– Amelia
The henlings turned as one to watch Orville land alone.
“Nine point five,” Amelia said, carefully noting the score on the official leaf.
“What planet are you on?” Durba twirled a primary feather near her ear in the universally understood sign for crazy. “It’s a ten at the very least.”
“Duh.” Harriet let out her trademark kookaburra cackle. “The scale only goes to ten.”
“Not when Orville’s landing it doesn’t.” Durba folded her wings across her chest to mark the end of the argument.
Amelia winked at Harriet. “I guess we can allow an extra point for the way he stowed his wings, can’t we?” She said.
“Yes,” Harriet agreed. “But only if we can minus one for that landing. I could have done that waaaay better.”
“I believe I folded my arms,” Durba said with a huff. “And anyway, unless you’re considering mating out of your species, I don’t believe your opinion counts.”
“Oh no!” Harriet glanced over at Stormfeather who appeared to be giving Orville a stern lecture. “What’s Ms doing now?”
“I’ll bet it’s my brother’s fault,” Amy said from her reclined position.
“You’re not even looking,” Harriet said. “Where is he by the way? Durba’s been insisting we watch these two duet all week.”
“Blech,” Amy said. “Hopefully he’s got that Ape Flu.”
“You always say that.” Harriet waved away the comment. “Oh look! She’s making him choose a new partner and no-one wants him. But cheer up,” she nudged Durba, “there’s plenty more maggots in the bin.”
“What’s he doing?” Durba pointed at Douglas Douglas.
“Staring at his own beak?” Amy guessed.
“He’s going to pay for it later,” Harriet said. “It’s such a pain in the neck.”
Amelia frowned. Durba laughed. But it took Amy to say what everyone was thinking. “What, tried it, have you?”
“Yes,” Harriet nodded seriously. “Look.” She stood up, her head wobbling as she demonstrated. “It’s our eyes, you see. They’re in the wrong place. Makes it real hard on the neck.”
“So it’s true…” Amy struggled to finish her sentence through laughter. She slapped Harriet on the back as she wiped tears from her eyes. “I always knew kookaburras were the dumbest.”
“Oh no!” Amelia was still watching the cocklings. Her wing flew to her beak in shock. “What’s…what’s she making your poor ol’ Orville do?!”
“She’s gone way too far this time,” Durba agreed, covering her eyes. “I can’t watch this.”
Amy said. “If I find out this is because my brother’s looking for those stupid curlews again, I’ll…I’ll…I’ll think of something!”
“Tell me when it’s over,” Durba said.
“Errr,” Amelia nudged Durba. “You should probably look now. I think he’s singing to you.”
Durba opened her eyes, a slow, sincere smile spreading across her face as she lowered her wing. “Ooooh he’s mine alright!” She cooed.
“Now look at Douglas Douglas,” Amelia said. “What the hawk is wrong with that bird?! Is he seriously pretending to be sick? He is! He’s—
“By hawk,” Durba cursed. “How dare he. Nobody insults my mate that way.”
“Ahem,” Harriet said. “Your mate? Does that mean you’re choosing him now? Before debut?!”
“You know what?” Durba crossed her wings over her breast again. “You’re right!”
“Oh thank the Circle!” Harriet said with a cackle. “Cos for a minute there I thought you were going to break with tradition and—”
In a blur Durba was on her feet and on her way to Stormfeather. Harriet got up as if to follow but Amelia laid a wingtip on her shoulder. “Let her go,” she said.
“But…but…she can’t just break with tradition!” Harriet complained.
It was Amy’s turn to cross her wings over her breast. “And why not? Why, tell me, is tradition more important than love?”
“Errr…” Harriet sat back down as a cheer rose up from the cocklings. Amy turned in time to see Orville and Durba lifted up by his cockling friends, laughing as they shouted something, high-feathering each other. It looked like Stormfeather was instructing them to stop, but unless she raised her voice or stamped her claws the raucous mob wasn’t going to hear her.
“Orville looks like a stunned mullet,” Amy grinned.
“Actually,” Harriet agreed, “so does Durba. But,” she added quickly as Amelia’s smile grew, “it doesn’t mean I agree it’s right. She should have waited til debut.”
Finally Stormfeather emitted an uncharacteristically subdued sound halfway between stifled-yell and strangled-screech. Douglas Douglas let go of Orville’s leg faster than a seagull swallows a rotten prawn and the pair were back on the ground.
“Come on,” Amelia said. “Let’s congratulate Durba.”
Evolution: it's for the birds 